


affections

by jjokkiri



Category: Monsta X (Band)
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Feelings, Fluff, Light Angst, M/M, Pining, Post-Break Up, kiho monthly, songwriters
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-28
Updated: 2018-04-28
Packaged: 2019-04-29 04:58:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,135
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14465535
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jjokkiri/pseuds/jjokkiri
Summary: Sometimes, silently caring for someone is the best way to tell them you love them. Or at least, that’s what Hoseok thinks, when he can never find the right moment to tell Kihyun how he feels.





	affections

**Author's Note:**

> for round 2 of [kiho monthly](https://archiveofourown.org/collections/kihomonthly), filling the _hurt/comfort_ prompt.

The door to the studio fell shut with a soft click. Hoseok stepped away from the door, a small bag in his hand with a convenience store logo printed onto it—a smiley face, with some words neatly printed underneath. But, the mood in the dark studio was much too gloomy for the presence of the smiley face, Hoseok noted as he approached the red-haired figure laying slouched against all the equipment laid out across the desk, just where he thought he’d find him.

The only source of light in the room was the flickering screensaver on the young man’s computer, casting a faint light across his sleeping face.

Leaning over the chair and the sleeping figure’s back, Hoseok placed the bag down onto the desk. The sound of the metal in the bag softly scraping against the desk woke the other man up.

Suddenly jolting awake from the unexpected sound, the other man sleepily straightened up, his eyes fluttering open as he looked around the room, slowly registering his surroundings. He blinked, slowly.

“Hey, sleepyhead,” Hoseok greeted, softly.

Finally snapping to his senses, the red-haired man tilted his head back, staring up and meeting Hoseok’s eyes. In any other moment, perhaps, he might have thought their position was adorable. But, Hoseok silently noted the way his eyes were puffy and red, as if he’d cried himself to sleep. His heart ached at the thought.

“You’re going to destroy your back and your neck, if you keep sleeping like this. I didn’t get you a sofa for your studio for you to continuously sleep at your desk, Kihyun,” he remarked.

The other man, Kihyun, rolled his eyes and pursed his lips into a frown.

“You’re such a dad,” Kihyun retorted, voice laced with the rasp from the lack of using his voice (or maybe it was the strain of crying for hours, but Hoseok wished so hard for it to be the former). “I can take care of myself fine.”

“You clearly can’t,” Hoseok replied. “C’mon, neither of us want you having a killer kink in your neck for the next ten years, because you fell asleep at your desk.”

“I can live with it,” Kihyun said. Hoseok nudged him, softly. “You’ll sponsor all my weekly massages, won’t you?”

“What do you think I am? Your sugar daddy?”

Kihyun snorted, “No, you’re my favourite co-worker.”

“Well, listen to your favourite co-worker. Don’t be stubborn,” he said, gently. “You’re going to fall asleep one day and drool all over your equipment. You can live with the pain, but can your wallet? I know mine can’t.”

Making a face, Kihyun huffed a breath of air. He couldn’t deny that Hoseok was right.

“You’ll let me use your stuff,” he replied, simply. Hoseok chuckled softly, nudging at the younger man again.

“You already know that I’d let you, huh?” he asked, softly.

Kihyun’s lips tugged into a small smile.

“Yeah, you do so much for me,” he answered. “You’re so good to me, Hoseok.”

Hoseok’s expression softened and he sighed. Wrapping his arms around Kihyun’s body from behind and pulling him into a hug, Hoseok pressed his lips together, firmly. The dark-haired man buried his face into Kihyun’s red hair, resisting the urge to say something he shouldn’t. The younger man said nothing, relaxing in Hoseok’s arms.

“Then, let me keep being good to you,” he said, “Come to the sofa. You’re not going to get any work done right now. You’re in no condition to be working, anyway.”

Reluctantly, Kihyun shrugged himself out of Hoseok’s arms (the older man hesitant to let go of his body for a moment), and stood up. The sofa was a mere few steps away, but Kihyun’s footsteps still trudged his body over. Hoseok followed him, reaching a hand towards the dial behind the speakers to turn on the neon lights hidden behind the sofa. The studio was much too dark, now that Kihyun was awake and willing to move.

Kihyun waited for Hoseok to take a seat, before he sat down next to him and leaned against the older man’s body. Hoseok reached for the bag, which he’d placed on the desk and gently put it into Kihyun’s lap. In a moment of curiosity, the younger man peered into the bag, but he barely even bothered to register the contents, before he gave up in favour of resting against Hoseok, again.

The warmth of the younger man’s body against his had Hoseok’s heartbeat picking up.

“What’d you bring me?” Kihyun asked, resting his head against Hoseok’s shoulder. The older man leaned back against the sofa, making himself comfortable to support the added weight on his shoulder.

“Energy drinks and ramen,” he replied, glancing down at Kihyun. From his angle, he could see every individual lash above Kihyun’s eyes. It had his heart skipping a beat, but he mentally scolded himself for it.

Kihyun clicked his tongue in disapproval at the response, but only nuzzled a little closer to the dark-haired man. “You should have brought me some more cigarettes, and maybe some hard liquor.”

“Why?” Hoseok challenged, “So you can kill your voice?”

“At the minimum,” Kihyun answered, simply. Hoseok made a face at him, but Kihyun couldn’t see it.

“But, then, who will record all my demos for me?”

Kihyun scoffed, “You can sing, too.”

Hoseok hummed, finally tearing his eyes away from the younger man.

“I can,” he replied, a small smile on his lips. “But, not quite like you.”

Kihyun shot him a look, but refrained from making a comment.

They both knew what Hoseok meant—‘not quite like you’, because there was no one in the world who sang quite like Yoo Kihyun, to Hoseok. There wasn’t a single missed moment of praise, when Hoseok asked Kihyun to record demos for him, simply because the older man adored his voice.

He made it known; made sure that Kihyun knew he was his biggest fan. There was no arguing with Hoseok, when it came to their singing skills, because the older man would always be most biased towards Kihyun.

“How are you feeling?” Hoseok asked, after a moment. Kihyun shrugged.

“Like crap,” he replied. The dark-haired man pursed his lips.

“Have you been doing anything outside of sleeping in your studio for the past week?”

It had been a week since Kihyun’s boyfriend had broken up with him. The younger man was devastated—genuinely believed they would have lasted so much longer. Hoseok had been the first person Kihyun contacted, after the breakup, asking what he should do. Then, Hoseok didn’t have an answer for him, but he’d mentally promised himself that he’d take care of the younger man, until that pretty light in Kihyun’s eyes returned.

(Until he could see Kihyun smile that pretty smile he’d grown to adore, again.)

“Trying to work,” he answered. “I figured shoving all of my feelings into a song would work.”

Hoseok glanced over to the computer, before looking at Kihyun, again.

“You haven’t managed to do anything, have you?”

Kihyun ignored his question, but it was so obvious from the look on his face that the older man’s assumption was correct. Hoseok’s question might as well have been rhetorical.

Hoseok frowned, but he said nothing, letting Kihyun continue on with speaking, as if he’d never been interrupted.

“I’ve written my fair share of songs about heartbreak,” Kihyun continued, playing with his fingers. “Some terribly sad idol group out there and their agency will be fine with commissioning another one.”

Hoseok hummed softly, running his fingers absently through Kihyun’s hair, “Mm, I think you deserve to write some love songs, too. Some happy love songs about crushing on someone, and just… thinking about them all the time—about how pretty they are, but how it never seems to be the right time to confess.”

 _“Tch,”_ Kihyun made a face. “That sounds like something you’d write. You always have so much inspiration for writing that kind of stuff. No wonder you’re so popular with girl groups. Where do you even get all of that inspiration?”

For a moment, Hoseok remained silent. He couldn’t honestly answer the question without being entirely too obvious about his feelings. And right now was far from the right time to make any remarks about the way his heart felt, when he was around Kihyun. _Funny that he had just been talking about songs which told the same kind of story._

Kihyun peered up at him, confused with the sudden moment of silence. The older man only offered him a soft, innocent smile in response to both the confusion and the inquiry. He couldn’t say anything more—couldn’t really do anything outside of looking into Kihyun’s eyes, and pretending that they were both mind readers.

“You’re just a natural sap,” he said, after a moment. “That’s why you always have the inspiration for that stuff.”

“Does that mean you’re a natural emo?” Hoseok asked, raising an eyebrow at him. Kihyun pursed his lips.

“Maybe it does,” he replied.

Hoseok chuckled, quietly, “I wouldn’t be surprised.”

Kihyun opened the bag, pulling out a packet of ramen and smashing it between his hands, “Did you drop by the convenience store before you came here?”

“Yeah,” Hoseok replied, nodding his head as his fingers began to card through Kihyun’s hair again. The younger man leaned into his touch, letting his eyes flutter shut for a moment, “I figured you wouldn’t have eaten, and it’s not anything much, but it’s better than starving yourself in here. But, when you’re feeling better and are willing to step into sunlight again, I’ll take you out for lunch somewhere nice, okay?”

“Really?” Kihyun asked, tearing open the seasoning packet with his teeth and dumping it into the ramen packet. He shook up the bag, tilting his head to look at Hoseok. “Where?”

“Wherever you want,” Hoseok replied. “I’ll take you anywhere you want.”

Kihyun lips curved into a small smile, “You’re really the best.”

Hoseok opened his mouth to speak again, to make a playful remark in response to Kihyun’s words, but his phone suddenly began to vibrate in his pocket. _A call from his mother_. Hoseok exhaled, wishing he had more time to spend with Kihyun. But, he’d promised his mother that he would see her.

He was snapped out of his thought, when Kihyun spoke up.

“It’s your mom,” Kihyun said, peering over his shoulder and wrapping his arms around Hoseok’s body, casually and leaning against him. Hoseok prayed Kihyun couldn’t hear his pounding heartbeat. “Do you have to go, now?”

“Yeah,” he replied, “I promised I’d take her to the night festival, tonight. I’d almost forgotten.”

“Do I distract you that much?” Kihyun teased.

“You do,” he answered. Kihyun would never know how _honest_ his response was, however. But, when he was hugging him like this, Kihyun was the most distracting to him.

Hoseok rejected the call with a text to tell his mother he was on his way over to her place.

“Do you want to come with us?” he asked, after a moment of silence. “Just so that you’re not here all alone?”

Kihyun shook his head, smiling softly, “I’ll be fine, hyung. Don’t worry so much.”

Hoseok sighed, “Are you sure?”

“I promise I’ll be fine, you should go and spend some time with your mother.”

Sighing again, Hoseok got up and put his phone into his pocket, before turning to look back at Kihyun.

“I guess I’ll be headed out, now.”

“Have fun,” Kihyun nodded his head towards him, “And take care of yourself.”

“I should be saying that to you,” Hoseok replied. Kihyun snorted.

There was a strange weight on Hoseok’s shoulder, when he turned to leave. Perhaps, it was from the feelings he never had the nerves to confess, or perhaps, it was from a worry that he would never be able to properly pinpoint.

The younger man broke his train of thought again, when he spoke up from behind him.

“Hey, hyung?” Kihyun started, after a moment. Hoseok turned to look at him, hand still on the doorknob. Kihyun offered him a small smile, “Thank you for being here for me.”

At the sight of the smile, the older man felt a comforting wave sate his mind of the raging war in his head—the overthinking and the worries for the younger man suddenly calming. Kihyun looked entirely too small, wrapped up in his jacket and sitting on the sofa and staring up at him, purple neon lights backlighting his pretty features.

It seemed, no matter what, Kihyun always managed to look breathtaking to Hoseok.

Inhaling softly, he flashed a small smile, “No worries. I’d do anything for you, remember?”

“You’re too good to me,” Kihyun said, softly.

“And you deserve nothing but the best.”


End file.
